As I prep for my second meet, I've found myself trying to juggle a lot. Running a business, being a wife and friend, still working on my life cut and oh yeah.. training. I was all jacked up and ready for this meet until I remembered that my life is almost completely different than it was while prepping for my last meet. 

I find myself with no motivation to train or eat well.. or eat at all. Sounds insane right? Well when you're really busy sometimes you forget, I even had to set reminders on my phone to eat. I'm a perfectionist at heart and sometimes I question if I should even do this because my lifts aren't technically perfect and my numbers aren't where they should be in comparison to how long I've been training.  It makes me want to quit. Then I read this article from PowerRack 

It made me realize that although I SHOULD be at a different level, I'm not mentally putting in the work. I'm mild by nature and sometimes my need to be perfect makes me procrastinate out of fear. I'd rather not try because of fear of failing. But if I could just change my thought process, I could be a better lifter. And at the real core of it all, I could be a better person. I could be a better wife and a better friend. 

After my grandmother passed away, I spent an entire day trying to book plane tickets and a hotel and deal with constant calls and texts. To be completely transparent, I wasn't very close to my grandmother, but I was still saddened by her passing and I was attending the funeral to be with my dad during this very difficult time for him. As the day pressed on, my will to train started to dwindle. I doubted that it would go well. I doubted that I could even finish what was programmed for me. But then I remembered the article again. I remembered that I needed to attack the weights. My approach had to change. I had to figure out a way to put all that emotion and stress from the day and put it into my lifts. I needed to somehow channel that energy.  

Top set for the day was a squat AMRAP of 245lbs. If you follow me on Instagram, you know how that lift went. I’m usually methodical in my lifts, sometimes...most time overthinking it. But today, I wanted it to be different. I remember visualizing the platform and that feeling of adrenaline and excitement. By my third rep, I was pretty spent, but I wanted to go pass that point where my brain told me I was done.  I usually let myself give up. But I reset and again I envisioned the platform. I knew I had more in me. And  I did it! I got 4 reps in. And I was so proud of myself. Because I put all the emotions and frustrations into that set, when I racked the bar I literally buckled and balled my eyes out. Not sure where that all came from but I taught myself a lesson… I taught myself that I could do it. If I change my approach, I can do the things I didn’t think I could. 

This blog was a bit personal but I  hope you enjoyed it and the Power Rack article. I saved the power rack piece and go back to it often to remind myself that I’m in control of the weight....and you are too.